Update: (Yes, I still try to blog!)

Whew, I never blog anymore. I long to get better and be more diligent, but not sure when that is actually going to happen.  I have two little kiddos who require my attention ALL. OF. THE. TIME!  Who am I kidding I love being their mom.  They are awesome in every way (except when Kensleigh purposely knocks over her friend Oliver or smacks Mikah on the head) Okay, so maybe not all of the time...

We are doing well over in the Kim household.  Kensleigh is becoming such a sweet little girl (yes, little girl-I can't believe she isn't a baby anymore) and Mikah is growing like a weed.  Everyday I try and tell him to slow down but he doesn't listen.

 This has been a big past 6 months for Kensleigh. She has learned to use the "big" potty, given up her paci, and sleeps in her very own big bed!  Luckily, she only tried to kill me when we were potty training.  At least now I know what I'm in for for the second time around.  But all in all it wasn't as bad as some of the stories I hear (or at least thats what i'm telling myself).  Transitioning her to her big girl bed was easy.  I was prepared to leave her in her crib forever,  but one night, early in Decemebr I looked at her and asked her if she wanted to sleep in her big bed or little bed-She said big bed and that was that. Giving up the beloved paci I was dreading.  She only got it at nap and night time, but she LOVED that thing.   I. MEAN. LOVED!  But we took a trip to my parents a couple of weeks ago, I didn't take one with us and while she asked about it she went to bed there without it. When we returned home she asked about it once and I told her I didn't know where it was and again that was that. Now, before the trip to my parents I tried cutting her paci, hoping she wouldn't want it anymore.  Well, that definitely didn't work out as planned.  She told me it was broken went and threw in the trash then preceded to pitch a  fit of scream-crying. I was weak, weak I tell you-I went, dug it out of the trash and gave it right back to her.  Now she couldn't suck on it, but she wanted it nonetheless.

Mikah is growing way too fast.  He is such a sweet baby.  Always happy.  He is now 6 months old! ( I know, i'm in denial too) But I love that he is becoming more interactive, playful, and wanting to move around and keep up with his sister.  And boy can she make him laugh.  They both get to just a cackling and it MELTS.MY.HEART.  He currently sits up like a little gorilla, you know with his hands in front of him holding himself up, kinda hunched over.  Its sweet.  Then he just topples over, looks at you and smiles. Then proceeds to try and swim his way across the floor.  He ends up rolling in circles across the room.  He will be crawling before I know it.  I'm not ready for that yet.

We have our days and our moments but all in all we are doing great.  Being a mom is the hardest job but I wouldn't trade it for the world, even on the bad days and the sleep deprived days.  (At least on the sleep deprived days I have my Spark to get me through!)

Dear Mikah,

Dear Mikah,

You are two months old! Whew, how time flies...You have been such a delight and joy in our lives and though it's only been 10 weeks I can't remember what our days were like before you.  You started sleeping through the night just last week.  I was just starting to wonder when you would drop that middle of the night feeding.  Though i'm happy to be getting a little more sleep myself, I find myself still waking up around that 4-5 o'clock hour and i'm slightly sadden at not getting to hold you close in the still of the night- just me and just you.

You love, love, love your sister.  You always give her a big smile when she comes near and believe me, she absolutely adores  you.  She is constantly talking about you, hugging and kissing all over you.  When she hears you cry, she makes sure to come tell me, "baby mikah crying momma" and every once in awhile she gets a pouty face and tears up when you cry.  She also likes to make sure you have a paci near. I have to constantly tell her not the shove it in your mouth.  You don't care too much for the good ole paci, your sister on the other hand...

You love to be held upright and patted on the back. You love to be in your vibrating seat when we are all in the kitchen cooking, cleaning, or eating.  Kensleigh likes to climb up on the counter and get in your seat too.  I'm waiting for the day she just sits right on top of you.  You follow my voice and look all around and when you find me you always give me a big smile; it melts my heart.  You grab and put the death grip on my hair; i've definitely had to start wearing it up more. You do this sort of  half laugh/cackle; it's really sweet.  You are a great sleeper and a great little eater.  When I first brought you home I thought I'd never get anything done because you ate so much.  But after about two weeks you fell into a good little 3 hour routine and have stuck with it ever since.

I was a little worried about having a baby boy, but you've made it easy.  You are such a sweet little blessing in my life.  I didn't realize how much my heart could love, until I had you.

I  love you,

Your Momma

Kensleigh's TWO!

Some turned two this past month!

We had a small little party with just a few friends this past weekend to celebrate Kensleigh turning two.  I'd think it safe to say that she has a blast.  We kept it simple this year.  I have a newborn and knew I had to if I was going to keep my head above water. 

She is talking up a storm these days.  I love watching her interact with others and also play by herself.  It's safe to say the child can keep herself entertained. I most often wonder what conversation she just had with herself or her baby doll.  My favorite word that she says right now is "bugfly".  It sounds like she's saying butterfly, but she's definitely calling a fly a bug-fly.  Cuteness! She is turning into such a sweet and "passionate" little girl.  My baby is growing up and she's only just now two.  I am blessed to call her mine!

Oh, Chick Fil A

The other day after our trip to the park I got the idea to go the Chick Fil A for lunch.  I was with a friend who has a two year old as well and she graciously agreed.  (Mind you this is the first trip I have taken both kiddos on besides going to the doctor and park.)

We are all in the parking lot getting the kiddos out of the car and we all hold hands.  Me with the baby carrier, then Kensleigh, her friend, and his mom.  It was cute, the two little ones holding hands, walking side by side.  We walked in and everyone in there stopped, looked at us and smiled.  Then a nice young man who worked there came up to us, greeted us, and said hey to the tots.  Very nice you think, but when he said hey to Kensleigh the screaming tears broke out.  (She does not like when people get in her face.)  I mean you would have thought he was trying to kidnap her, her cries were so loud.  Her little friend cried out too because Kensleigh had let go of his hand.  She wanted me to pick her up and then within another second Mikah decides to chime in.  So there we were all cute and happy and not two seconds later all in tears. I mean I wanted to cry because both of mine were crying.  My mind goes into panic mode, I mean I felt like I had a red arrow above my head flashing crazy just had a baby hormones over here.

Needless to say all the staff was extra nice and when all was calm we had a great time.  The little ones got to play and me and my friend got to chat for a bit.  In the moment I wanted to hide under a table, but now that I look back on it, it makes me laugh.  Babies will cry and two years will be two years...

Life with Two Kiddos...

The first week after coming home from the hospital I was lucky enough to have my mom come and stay with us.  She was a big help-especially with Kensleigh.  She made sure we were all fed and kept the house clean.  With her here I was able to rest and take it easy and not worry so much about what Kensleigh had gotten into...Bless her little soul, she is such a sweetie, but into EVERYTHING right now.   

Mikah on the other hand is just as easy going as can be, currently.  He is such a blessing to us and we didn't know what we were missing until they placed him in our arms.  He is a big eater and pooper for that matter.  I was worried about him having jaundice like Kensleigh, but after he literally pooped 6 times in his first 24hours they said I had nothing to worry about.  He loves to sleep, loves to lay on our chest and snuggle, and constantly looks all around when he's awake.  He loves the momaroo seat and loves to be swaddled.  

The first few days home were somewhat tiring.  Getting adjusted, waking up for those middle of the night feedings, you know the drill.  But after a few days we all fell into a little routine that worked.   He currently wakes once to nurse in the middle of the night and will sleep around a 5 hour stretch or so (like 11-4ish).

When my mom left I was worried that all chaos would break out-but we've honestly done pretty good.  I've managed to maintain the daily routine, and even cook dinner a couple of times.  We've gotten out a couple of  times to walk with friends and today I managed to get us all out the door, dressed, and fed to make an 8:30am doctor appointment.  Can't say I wasn't worried about that one, I thought for sure we'd be late, but we made it with ten minutes to spare.  

All in all things have been good and not too overwhelming.  I mean I have definitely had my moments-you know those moments when you feel completely overwhelemed and think how in the world ???  But with each day its gets easier and things start to fall back into place and I'm learning the new normal.  It takes a lot of grace and I'm learning to embrace it for all that it is-precious chaotic moments that I'll never get back.  And hey, there are definitely sweet moments too.

Kensleigh LOVES her baby brother, Constantly wants to hold him and gives him tons os kisses.

Getting ready to leave the hospital.

Okay, I'm dressed..Lets go home

I think he is wondering why we are taking so many pictures...

Didn't really enjoy his sponge bath.

Hello world, I'm a week old!

Two weeks!

Dee Dee and Mikah.  Such a sweet boy.

Mikah's Birth Story

Well, he's finally here and I am no longer pregnant! For those closest to me know how hard the last few weeks were for me.  Partly, because my precious daughter came early, 37.5 weeks (which spoiled me), and then mostly because I had started to feel bad towards the end.  I can't describe it, just not my "pregnant" self.  Turned out I did have an infection, which after a trip to the hospital got it all figured out, I was on the mend.  That was a stressful few days to say the least, but onto the birth story....

I had been only 1cm from 37weeks to 39weeks and was heading to my 40 week appointment preparing myself to hear the same thing again.  Thanks to my dear friend Rachel for listening to me cry pretty much after every.single.appointment  (again, hormones, sick, headaches, pregnant, not a good mixture-crazy emotional pregnant lady over here!)  Well, I ending up hearing quite the opposite.  I was now 4cm with a bulging bag.  Mikah looked great on the ultrasound that day, and my OB told me it would be soon; like the very next day.  I was thrilled and thought "finally, we made it!"

That night I started having contractions that were 15 minutes apart.  By morning they were 6 minutes apart and my doctor wanted me to go to hospital to start the process of having precious baby Mikah.  I got all checked in, and was ready.  My midwife wanted me to start pitocin to get my contractions closer together.  Therefore, my nurse started to put in my IV.  Well that was an experience all in itself.  I ended up being stuck five times by my nurse and a member of the IV team, all because they kept hitting a valve. It took over an hour ( & three bruises later) to finally get the IV in.  It was after 10am when they started me on pitocin. 

My nurse and midwife told me to just let them know when I was ready for my epidural, however since my contractions weren't extremely painful until after my water broke with Kensleigh I expected it to be about them same with Mikah-WRONG!.  So I told them I would wait it out until I was truly uncomfortable.  Well after about an hour I was definitely experiencing some pain but was waiting to be checked to see where I was at before going forward with the epidural.  I asked my nurse when my midwife would be back to check me and she told me as soon as she was done assisting in another delivery.  Well, about 20 minutes later  (11:35ish) I couldn't wait any longer and told my nurse I was ready for the epidural.  Every time I had a contraction I was having the urge to use the restroom and Jong was having to unhook me, help me to the bathroom, and re-hook me; it was becoming a nuisance.  After I made it back to bed from my last potty break my water broke.  And lets just say that my contractions doubled in pain.  My nurse helped me lay down on my side and said that the anesthesiologist was on his way. (This was all about 11:55am)

The anesthesiologist made it to the room alright.  He took one look at me and asked my nurse if we had time. Had time? I thought, with my head buried in my mattress and hand gripping the bed rail I whispered/mumbled/cried, Please have time... SIDE NOTE: Jong had left the room at this point to go get his jacket from a friend in the lobby because I was apparently freezing him out of the room.  I had no idea he had left because I was concentrating on my contractions and trying to live through them.  Then I hear the anesthesiologist  "when was the last time she was checked?"  My nurse replies, "Yesterday afternoon she was 4cm a her checkup."  To which he replied, "she needs to be checked so I can make sure I have time to give her the epidural."

My nurse made some comment about my midwife liking to check her own patients but that she would do it since my midwife wasn't in the room currently.  So she rolls me over checks me says, "she's a 7, no she's an 8, we have time." WRONG again...

At this point with one nurse, and the anestegologist in the room, no husband either remember,  I scream and push and basically yell pressure!  My nurse starts calling people in through the call button, slight panic in her voice, and the anesthesiologist ran out to get Jong (who literally almost missed the birth of his son).

All I know at this point is that people are running all around me and that this baby was coming in a matter of seconds and I thought that Jong had passed out because he wasn't standing beside me.  I'm reaching for someone's hand to hold because most intense pain I have ever experienced and my doctor comes to my rescue.  He gives me two fingers to hold...squeeze, looks me in the eyes and says "Take your scream, contain it, then push with it ".  I took his advice and pushed once, (at this point  Jong made it back in the room and switched places with my doctor, who warned him that I could break his fingers), pushed again and Mikah was born.  It was an intense release and myself  & body I think were in shock.  

He was beautiful and crying and I couldn't believe what had just happened in a matter of about fifteen minutes. Neither could the nurses/midwife/doctor.  They all said how abnormally fast he was born, but that apparently Mikah had finally decided to come into this world and wasn't waiting another second.  

Jong recalls my doctor swooping down to "catch" Mikah like a football, lifting him up and saying "Here's your baby!"

All I know is that it was fast, it was expected yet unexpected, it was painful, but it was beautiful all at the same time.  And that I couldn't have done it without my doctor, midwife, team of nurses, and of course my husband (who I'm glad wasn't passed out in the corner of the room and made it back to the room just in the nick of time-we can thank the anesthesiologist for that.)

He was here, finally here.  Mikah James Kim.   And our lives were forever changed again. 

Mikah James Kim

August 30, 2013

12:15pm

8lb1oz

20in

Mikah's Nursery....It's been a long journey...

Well, its finally complete.  Thanks to the hard work of my Daddy and Uncle David.  They slaved away this weekend installing the beadboard and then Dad painted it all the next day.  (My mom came up the weekend before and painted the Navy.  Lets just say that was a task in itself-It took 3 coats to finally be smooth and even and that doesn't even include the primer coat.)  I know I didn't do much except wait on them and get them what they needed but I'm pretty sure I was just as tired as they were.  After the paint was dry Jong and I went to town putting all the furniture back in its place, cleaning/dusting, and then setting everything up for Mikah.

I am pleased with how it all turned out.  I went back and forth on what I wanted to do for his room for so long.  Then when I finally decided on the bedding, I went back and forth on the paint color and beadboard.  But it looks great and I am so pleased. 

Paint color-Bold Blue by Benjamin Moore

Thanks to Nicki from Adoore-It for the Plaques!

This room came a long way from being pink.  But I'm glad its finally done.  I had Kensleigh's Nursery done about 2 weeks after I found out she was a girl.  So being 36 Weeks and just now finishing his room, well lets just say it was really stressing me out.  

Sorry for the poor picture quality-I had taken these with my phone.